Final Reaction

      Like Mr. Shapiro mentioned in class, the crime took about one page of the book, followed by 500 pages of Rasklnikovs punishment. I was not expecting the punishment that Raskolnikov dealt with throughout the whole novel. I obviously knew that his guilt and emotions would eventually get to him. What surprised me the most was Raskolnikovs luck and the way that he was able to get away with his crime so easily; he committed the crime so carelessly. I thought that he would last at most a week before he was caught. Somehow, something always came up to clear Raskolnikovs name when the subject of the murder came up. Most of the times it was just Raskolnikov imagination getting to him and creating all of these scenarios that weren't even real. Raskolnikov began to over think every situation after the murder was committed. At times he even said and did things that made it pretty obvious that he was the murderer, almost as if he wanted people to catch him so he could be relieved of his guilt.
       As I continued to read the novel, I thought that it got pretty repetitive. It seemed as if I was reading the same exact scene over and over again with some minimal changes. Just when I thought I knew exactly what would happen, something random and completely unpredictable would happen, for example the painter randomly confessing as the murderer and the random appearance of Svidrigailov. Svidrigailov is definitely the weirdest character in this book. He came out of nowhere, yet somehow knew everything.
       To be honest, I was not understanding the complete depth of the novel until we started to read and discuss Notes from the Underground. Learning more about Dostoevsky helped me understand the novel. I was able to relate the underground man to Raskolnikov. Although they are both completely different stories, the two main characters struggle with the same issues. Like the underground man, Raskolnikov is also very contradicting. He thinks of himself as this great being, greater than anyone else in society, yet he admits at times that he is mad and nothing but a coward. Raskolnikov gets upset that he is not accepted into society and has troubles understanding what makes him so different. The whole novel is about Raskolnikov struggling to decide whether what he did was a good thing or not, whether he should confess or just run away, and whether he was a madman or a hero. This makes me believe that Raskolnikov is able to see things around him with clarity; but he was able to commit the murder and make his own decisions, so I am still not sure about that.
         The ending to the novel consisted of Raskolnikov finally confessing to the murder, but no punishments or anything was said after that. Raskolnikov was so concerned about what everyone would think of him after he confessed to the murder, but we were never really able to see that. That reassures me that the whole point of the novel was to show Raskolnikovs thought conflicts. Dostoevsky doesn't even go into the detail of Raskolnikovs trial or his punishment, he just writes about Raskolnikovs struggle to make a choice. If I had not read Notes from the Underground I do not think that I would have enjoyed this book as much as I have; I would have not understood what was truly going on and would have probably thought that Raskolnikov was just some crazy arrogant man.